Move Beyond All the Handcrafted Cheese: France's Potato Chips Are Utterly Sinful.
This past Christmas, I spent time in the French countryside, a place that seemed on its best behaviour. Discreet, sparkling decorations, outdoor market stands piled high with remarkably pristine produce, and a vast array of cheeses that could line the whole Eurotunnel with arterial plaque. Overflowing trays of lustrous seafood on ice visible behind fogged brasserie windows. Upon seeing a lengthy yet well-mannered line of well-dressed citizens retrieving their handmade yule logs, I thought, disloyally, that my place of origin, York, which becomes a modern reimagining of a tableau of excess at this time of year with e-cigarettes tasting of mincemeat and BuzzBallz, might benefit from a few lessons.
The Elegant Facade
But all this “art de vivre” affectation is just a polished mask – The nation succumbs just as easily to its lowest desires as the rest of us. Simply step inside a supermarket and the truth is revealed. The snack food corridor constitutes a temple of indulgence, stacked with such varieties as *bleu d'Auvergne*, chickpea fritter, Flemish stew and salted butter tastes. What kind of person consumes butter crisps? It is reminiscent of an item typical of the notorious midway festivals where they fry solid butter in batter. An entertainer has asserted they represent the pinnacle of snacking she has ever sampled, however she has undoubtedly been influenced by a form of local propaganda – she grew up in Brittany.
A Global Lawlessness
One must acknowledge the crisp flavouring industry across the globe is just as anarchic as Silicon Valley. No one will allow the humble spud to shine on its own, embellished as it should be by a simple, respectful sprinkle of sodium. The UK boasts a checkered past when it comes to snack tastes across Britain, notably around Christmas. Not long ago, it should be remembered, introduced gingerbread Doritos and exclusive steak-and-pâté flavoured chips. Let us also recall that time a well-known shop believed “sparkling wine and seasonal fruit” made for a good idea for a savoury snack? I expected more of the land of Escoffier.
Where does it end? *Pâté*-flavoured snacks? Profiterole? Gauloises? I should stop, I’m only giving them ideas.
